If you are a single man who enjoys casual sex or if you are in a monogamist relationship, I believe you will want to know how to please your girlfriend or partner in bed. Although sexual intercourse is an act that leads to pleasure, women do not always enjoy it. It appears that many women remain unsatisfied in bed. I learned about this after years of consulting women at the clinic. These women would tell me that they were left with a sense of disappointment because of unsatisfying foreplay, an unpleasant penetration, or lack of orgasm. Let’s talk about the three main complaints I hear at the clinic and how we can help men learn more about what women want in bed.
I know many couples like to get straight down to business, which could be excellent, except many women tell me they agree to skip foreplay because they think men do not like it. I find this interesting because a lot of men told me that they like to take their time in bed, but are not sure if their women want it. They feel like their women rush them into penetration.
Let’s try this: engage in foreplay for at least 10 minutes. I am a big believer in equal rights in bed, so 10 minutes divided equally means providing pleasure to her for at least five minutes and receiving five minutes of pleasurable touch. Although it is not a lot of time, it is an excellent start.
Foreplay is far more critical than it seems; it helps every woman prepare her body for penetration and her mind for pleasure. Excellent foreplay starts with massaging and kissing all over the body. You can gradually add a more sensual touch in the erogenous body parts (breasts, nipples, inner thigh, vagina and clitoris) using your hands, mouth, or sex toys and other accessories. By then, the moment of penetration will be very satisfying for both of you.
Many men do not differentiate between pleasurable penetration that applies a bit of force, to the use of a great deal of power that may lead to pain. “He hurts me during intercourse” is a prevalent complaint I hear from women. Many men believe that forceful penetration makes a woman feel more pleasure but oftentimes, the opposite is the case. True, for some women it can be enjoyable, but it can also be excruciatingly painful, especially if it is too rough. Pain during intercourse will make a woman lose her desire and it will lead to unsatisfying sexual intercourse. Women can enjoy strength and power in bed, but not when it hurts. My advice is that you start with slow and pleasant penetration, then ask your partner if you can apply more force and observe her response.
A lot of women can orgasm during self-pleasure and even in bed, by stimulating the clitoris area. Yet, many women enjoy it more when you take an active part. Although it may seem obvious, men tend to ignore it. To be more precise, some may ask the woman once they reach orgasm, “Do you want to cum?” while others will end the sexual encounter at this point.
Why am I mentioning this? Because it is the most common complaint I hear from women at the clinic. Women want to reach orgasm with you; they want you to stimulate, touch and add sexual pleasure so they can climax with your help. My advice is if you cannot slow down the ejaculation, overcome the momentary exhaustion after your orgasm, and spend a few more moments pleasuring her.